Love Better
Remember, you are loved, so go... love better!
Love Better
Love Small
One of the largest fabric collections in the world, a dark patch of history, and a reminder that love is best done locally.
"Remember, you are loved, so go, love better!"
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In the National Archives of the Coram foundation, they have digitized the records of dozens upon dozens of leatherbound books from the 18th century. These dusty tomes are filled with names now available online - John Bowles, Carolina Richmond, Clara Armstrong, Samuel Hull, Lucretia Folkes, Rebecca Shephard… in total over twenty-seven thousand names each representing children. The digitization project allowed these names and other accompanying details such as medical conditions (small pox and measles were common entries) and identifying details from the children (Dark hair, grey eyes, pale complexion, small red birthmark on left shoulder) But as careful as the archivists were, there is one detail from those leatherbound books they couldn’t bring into the digital realm – they couldn’t include the fabric cuttings.
I’m Scott Beyer and this is the Love Better podcast where we explore the truths and lies about love and more importantly how to turn love into a skill – something we can get better at and hone along the way.
The Coram Foundation was started by Thomas Coram – a shipwright who made his fortune in the 1700’s. Thomas Coram was from working class roots. He didn’t have any of the aristocracy in his blood, so it took Thomas Coram seventeen years to gather the needed political and financial support, but eventually he established the first and oldest charity in the history of the United Kingdom – the Foundling Hospital.
In 1741, London was the largest city in the world. With a population over 600,000 and growing by the day, London was swelling in ways that were unheard of. From 1700 to 1800, London’s population doubled. With the Industrial Revolution just beginning and with British dominance in the world of international trade – London became a beacon of hope for people from all over the rural country sides of England, Scotland, Ireland, and Wales. The Siren’s call of opportunity didn’t work out for everyone though – 1 in 10 Londoners lived in abject poverty, and there were no social safety nets. Children were the most hard hit by disease, destitution, and the frightening realities of a world that didn’t value them.
It is this world of children in the streets, abandoned by a society that had neither time nor care for their plight that horrified Thomas Coram. Hence, the creation of the Foundling Hospital. The word ‘hospital’ was used in the broadest sense – children that were found or brought to the Foundling Hospital would be provided with hospitality. Medical care – yes, but also food, beds, education, and opportunities for an apprenticeship as they grew older if they were not claimed before reaching adulthood.
And so, in the desperation of poverty, many children didn’t have to be found – they were brought to Foundling Hospital by mothers grieved by their inability to care for them, but with love in their hearts to place them somewhere safe with the hopes of returning as soon as they found that stability London kept telling them was on the horizon.
So, each child’s name, along with a description was written down in one of those leatherbound books accompanied by a fabric token. A cutting of cloth from the mother’s own dress, shawl, or overcoat that could be used as proof that the child belonged to them when they came back someday.
Today, the fabric tokens of Foundling Hospital represent one of the largest collections of 18th century textiles in the world. Thousands of tiny pieces of parents left behind with their children.
The Foundling Hospital feels like a patchwork quilt of love to me, and some of those patches are dark and hard to look at – learning to love in the real world means facing hard realities of a world where pain, disease, isolation, and evil exist and often run unchecked over the lives of the most vulnerable.
What does it say about a society when it allows its weakest and most innocent to be cast aside and mistreated? 18th century London screamed prosperity, but in the dark corners of alleyways and rat-infested hovels, the children were left behind in the name of progress. How does that happen? How do people become so numb to the needs of others?
In the book of Ecclesiastes, Solomon states, “What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun. Is there a thing of which it is said, "See, this is new"? It has been already in the ages before us.” (Ecclesiastes 1:9-10)
Unfortunately, 18th century London is repeated throughout history over and over again. Today, in major urban centers around the world, there are people that are impoverished, sick, or vulnerable. What countries doesn’t have children who are in need of safety and security? What corner of the globe is without poverty? As our Lord Jesus Himself said, “For you always have the poor with you”
Unfortunately, though Jesus never intended it to be so, those words of His have been used as a rationalization for not helping the down and out. If the poor will be with us always – it sounds like an unfixable problem. Why even try? I imagine, for most people in London, that was exactly how they felt. Everyone had eyes. They saw the hungry children. They were on every street corner. You couldn’t miss them… but the problem seemed too big. After all, you can’t help all of them.
Which is where we make our mistake. Love isn’t global. It’s local. When you try and love big it becomes overwhelming, and you typically give up before you start. Love small.
Jesus sets this example for us in three ways. #1 Jesus loved small. He didn’t perform mass healings. In fact, He never even attempted to heal everyone. Every healing we read about in the gospels performed by Jesus was personal. How did Jesus improve people’s lives? One person at a time. From the blind man that He told to wash in the pool of Siloam, to Jairus’ daughter, to stopping in the middle of the street to converse with the woman that had reached out to touch the hem of his garment. Jesus, although capable of all things, sets the example of personal interaction. Stop trying to help everybody. Start helping somebody.
#2 He also provides us with the account of Lazarus and the rich man in Luke 16. Here is the description of the two men:
"There was a rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and who feasted sumptuously every day. And at his gate was laid a poor man named Lazarus, covered with sores, who desired to be fed with what fell from the rich man's table. Moreover, even the dogs came and licked his sores. (Luke 16:19-21)
Lazarus was at that rich man’s gates. The rich man would have passed him daily. Proximity matters. The rich man wasn’t just blind to mankind’s suffering. He chose to be blind to a specific man’s suffering – Lazarus. When we love local, we stop trying to see everybody and start seeing the needs right in front of us.
#3 Jesus gives us the parable of the Good Samaritan as a living example of what it means to “Love your neighbor as yourself” The Samaritan helped because he was there. He didn’t wake up and plan on running across a mugging victim, but when he saw someone in distress, he made a decision to step up and help.
When Thomas Coram saw the plight of the children of London, he began to help where he could. The Foundling Hospital didn’t help all of the children. Of the 27,000 they did help, they didn’t do it all at once either. The hospital started out with just a few and as opportunities opened up, they did what they could and made a difference.
Every fabric cutting in the registry of the Foundling Hospital has a sad story, some so sad it is painful to even think about… but someone has to… right? If we are going to love better, we are going to have to start doing something about something that is dark in this world. Learning to love small means you love at a scale that lets you invest your strength, your time, and your emotion into genuinely caring. Lots of people have had ideas for how to end world hunger, but ideas don’t feed people – meals actually made do.
Which is James’ point when he says, “If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed and filled," without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? (James 2:15-16)
Those we are close to (this can be physical family, our spiritual brothers and sisters, or intimate friends) rarely are left destitute when we can help. Most humans have a strong loyalty for their loved ones and would do a lot to make sure their needs were met. With our close family and friends, we tend to be pushy with our support. We go out of our way to help them, support them, and make sure their needs are met… even in the smallest things. We make sure those of our tribe have a safety net in us and that we will be there for them.
Unfortunately, for most people that’s where love ends… but God tells us there are two other groups of people that we should love small, too.
The second group is the stranger – the person who isn’t part of our tribe. Thomas Coram saw children that weren’t his and helped them. He also gave others a chance to participate in helping them, too! The Good Samaritan helped a stranger, and the rich man was condemned for not helping Lazarus – someone he had no familial responsibility for, but was in his world and sphere of philanthropy.
But there is a third group we are called to love small. We are told to love them with the same intensity, the same attention to detail, the same inconvenient care as the first two groups.
In Romans 12, the apostle Paul reminds us of the third group of people we must love.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." To the contrary, "if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:19-21)
That’s right. We must love our enemies. Notice the attention our enemies deserve – we should look for when they are hungry or thirsty and meet those needs. As evil as we feel they are being, we must overcome that evil with even more loving actions.
And if it seems impossible to you that you could ever get to a point where you could love your enemies like family… I’m going to tell you again – love small. Don’t start with your enemies, start with your neighbor, start with an acquaintance, start with your family. Love is like a muscle; you don’t pick up the heaviest barbell in the gym first. You consistently work up to the big league weights. If you aren’t currently helping anyone, start small. Start by helping someone close to you and as you do that, you can eventually radiate out further and further to the point when showing love to an enemy might not feel so crazy.
Because the registry of the Foundling Hospital isn’t full of big pieces of fabric. It is packed with tiny fabric cuttings from mothers that did what they could with the little strength they had, and those tiny people were taken one at a time and shown hospitality one child at a time.
The Bible is full of examples of small acts that were worthy of recording. From the widow of Zarephath that fed Elijah during the famine to King David inviting Mephibosheth to the royal table.
I think one of the reasons I am so enamored with the Foundling Hospital’s story is because it wasn’t a king or an archduke that started it. Thomas Coram was a shipwright that just wanted to make something right in a world that had gone very wrong. He didn’t set out to become the founder of the first and oldest charity in the United Kingdom. He didn’t have big plans. He was just looking out for the small people.
And in that, our Lord agrees.
I never tire of reading the words of Mark chapter 9:
And Jesus and His disciples came to Capernaum. And when He was in the house He asked them, "What were you discussing on the way?" But they kept silent, for on the way they had argued with one another about who was the greatest. And he sat down and called the twelve. And he said to them, "If anyone would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all." And he took a child and put him in the midst of them, and taking him in his arms, he said to them, "Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, and whoever receives me, receives not me but him who sent me." (Mark 9:33-37)
Learn to love better. Learn to love small.
As always, thank you for listening and hopefully we've done something to help make your life a little bit better. If you have a chance to rate, review or share the podcast it would be a blessing. By sharing with others or leaving a review on Apple Podcast or Spotify, you help us reach more people.
Next week, I can’t wait for you to meet my friend, Buck Barrett. Buck is one of the most vibrant and engaging people I know. Buck works for the FAA and is an evangelist in Western Washington. Buck and his wife Ashley are amazing people, with big hearts for people, and an amazing story.
I mentioned at the end of last season, that I was revamping my website. An update that was LONG overdue. A special thanks to Brady Cook and Diakonos Marketing for bringing BibleGrad.com into the modern era! If you are interested, you can sign up for a video series challenge through the website called the #HopeDoes challenge. Two short videos each week and a chance to grow in your hope by doing hopeful things. Just go to BibleGrad.com, scroll down and enter your email to get started.
Or maybe you have a fun or obscure history account, a feel-good news story, or a riveting scientific fact you think could help us love better. If so, I’d love to hear it! Feel free to email me at scott@biblegrad.com
And if you are ever in the Louisville, KY area, I’d like to invite you to come worship with me and my family at the Eastland congregation. We meet for worship every Sunday and have Bible classes for all ages on Wednesdays, too. If you want more information about Eastland, visit us at eastlandchristians.org. We would love to worship God with you and help you on your walk of faith.
And as always, until next time, “Remember, you are loved, so go… love better.”
